Things you must never know?

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    What is something I should never know?

    I have always been the skinniest in my family.

    One day, when I was in my teens, my mom told me something I wish she had kept to herself. She was breastfeeding me when I was a baby but her milk ran out and she couldn't afford to buy baby formula and so I was not fed at times. She believed that because I was malnourished I was not able to develop properly, hence the skinny me today.

    What she told me next made me resent my dad for the rest of my life. After I was born my parents were having both marital and financial problems. My dad ignored his duties and responsibilities for our family but selfishly focused on his personal interests only. I was literally left hungry so he could indulge his drinking habit.

    I have not stopped resenting my dad since I found out about this; he passed away when I was 19 and I had never forgiven him and still have not till this day. I don't blame my mom for telling me but I kinda wished she never did because then I would not have resented my dad.

    Updated 09/27/2017

    I did not tell my story here to spark any sort of debate or argument about the characters of my parents especially my mother, nor the circumstances surrounding the event when they happened. THIS HAPPENED 50 YEARS AGO!

    Many of you misinterpreted my story. I did not say I am skinny due to malnourishment, rather I stated that MY MOTHER BELIEVED because of what happened as such I am skinny today. However, this post isn't about my physical appearance is about something I wish I never knew because I do not need to add another unpleasant memory to my life.

    A lot of you talked about FORGIVENESS. Personally for me, forgiveness is an OVERSTATEMENT AND IT IS OVER-RATED. I DO NOT FEEL ANY BURDEN OR WHATSOEVER IF I NEVER FORGIVE MY FATHER OR THOSE WHO HURT ME IN MY LIFETIME. Albeit I can not erase my past, but I just really don't think about them. How hard is that? Don't we all control our own mind?

    There were many other things that happened I wish I never knew, but they did happen. However, life still goes on until the day I took my last breath!

    My sincere thanks to each and everyone of you who took your time to comment. You have every rights to voice your ‘personal’ opinions, but remember, THIS IS MY LIFE NOT YOURS. :)

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